The Last Straw

Six guys were playing poker when Smith loses $500 on a single
hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table.
Showing respect for their fallen comrade, the other five complete
their playing time standing up.

Roberts looks around and asks, "Now, who is going to tell the wife?"

They draw straws. Rippington, who is always a loser, picks the short one.
They tell him to be discreet, be gentle, don't make a bad situation
any worse than it is.

"Gentlemen! Discreet? I'm the most discreet man you will ever meet.
Discretion is my middle name, leave it to me."

Rippington walks over to the Smith house, knocks on the door, the
wife answers, asks what he wants.
Rippington says, "Your husband just lost $500 playing cards."

She hollers, "TELL HIM TO DROP DEAD!"

Rippington says, "I'll tell him."


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Lee-PA
Moderator, What's New Forum
lee@talkvegas.com

A blackjack dealer and a player with a thirteen count in his hand
were arguing about whether or not it was appropriate to tip the dealer.

The player said, "When I get bad cards, it's not the dealer's fault.
Accordingly, when I get good cards, the dealer obviously had nothing
to do with it so, why should I tip him?"

The dealer said, "When you eat out do you tip the waiter?"

"Yes."

"Well then, he serves you food, I'm serving you cards so you should
tip me."

"Okay, but, the waiter gives me what I ask for. I'll take an eight."

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Lee-PA
Moderator, What's New Forum
lee@talkvegas.com

Keep up the good work, Lee ....I can always use a chuckle!

Good stuff, Lee!

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Mark L. in NJ

Leaving the Las Vegas Casino one evening, a miserly gentleman walked
past the doorman without tipping him. Never the less, the doorman
helped the man into a taxi with a flourish and said pleasantly.

"By-the-way, in case you happen to lose your wallet on the way
home, Sir, just remember that you didn't pull it out here."

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Lee-PA
Moderator, What's New Forum
lee@talkvegas.com

Q: What's the difference between a blackjack player and a puppy?

A: Eventually a puppy stops whining.

JP,

Thanks for straightening that out, Lee told me that it was a wife and a puppy <G>!

jm

[This message has been edited by senatorjm (edited 14 August 2000).]